Merge Your Stuff (Without Killing Each Other)

As we are getting closer and closer to the time where we will have to bring all of our stuff together in one apartment, I become more and more anxious about this idea. I have  created a space I love and feel comfortable in, as I have lived by myself for a year and a half now. I have a routine and a place for things. I love my shabby chic decor and the feeling of home I get when I walk in the door. I am not anxious about living with him but I am anxious about all that he will bring. He doesn't care for "Shabby Chic" and he won't be moving in with just one suitcase. I know it will be okay! We will make it work, but oh please help me, I am nervous! Found this article and appreciate some of the advice :). Oh the joys of getting married!! Hehe. :)


Hate each other's decorating taste? Here's how to meet in the middle.

Face it: When you first move in together, the whole furniture-negotiation thing can get tricky. After all, you're doing more than just merging sofas and art -- you're blending two personalities and past lives. So how do you pull it off together? Read on.

Ditch That Baggage
Who you? Harbor junk? Admit it -- that floral comforter has gotta go. What isn't essential goes into storage, gets donated to charity, or sold on eBay. For can't-part-with-'em items, display them differently. His trophy collection may look a lot less heinous on brand-new mounted shelves than they do scattered on the bedroom floor.

Meet in the MiddleYou dig clean and modern; he loves warm and traditional.There's a place for everything, just not necessarily together. Since mixing French scenes with football posters is a tall order, relegate each style to an appropriate room. If he spends more time in the den, add some touches that will make him feel cozier. If she's always hanging in your home office, let that be the streamlined space with splashes of color.

Shop TogetherIf only your style dominates the décor of your together space, it’s not going to feel like a married home. Joint purchases help represent both personalities, so suck it up and shop as a team. Start with small things like frames, place mats, and lamps. To find where your styles overlap, scan our decor galleries together.

Book a FaceliftBefore you dump his black leather bachelor couch or he forces you to lose those cutesy checked chairs, give them a new life. Reupholster or slipcover pieces -- you'll save hundreds -- maybe even thousands of bucks -- instead of starting from scratch.

Maintain “Me” Space 
Sharing a home doesn't mean you have to hang in the same room 24-7. Designate Zen areas to escape to (okay, from each other). Maybe yours is the porch and his is the kitchen table. Wherever your Zen zone is, make it comfy with your favorite items.

Don't Panic-DecorateYou don’t have to deck out your entire home overnight -- in fact, it'll totally look thrown together if you do. Getting pieces you both agree on is a process, so make it fun -- a travel piece here, a birthday gift there. If you wind up with an eclectic mix of stuff, all the better. You're not a cookie cutter couple, so why make your home look that way?

wwww.thenest.com

Merge Your Stuff (Without Killing Each Other)

"5 Secrets to Cohabitating Bliss [Married Bliss]" by Michael Ian Black

I discovered this article in The Knot [the nest] magazine and found it funny more than any thing else. Have a great weekend everyone!   


You've done it. You've taken your relationship to the next level and you moved in together [are married]. Since I'm an expert at, well, everything, here are my personal tips for domestic domination.


1. Farts are the great equalizer - A lot of couples are afraid to play the butt trumpet in front of each other. Big mistake! You're living together now, guys; nothing is off-limits. Nobody likes to hold it in just because their partner is within the blast radius. So the sooner you start lettin' 'em rip, the happier both of you will be. Plus, farts are funny. You guys will get hours of merriment cutting them in front of each other. For maximum fun: Try closing the windows. 

2. When the in-laws dropped by unannounced, go clothing optional - Show them whose territory it is right away. They should follow the rules. You do in their home. They should in yours. If they insist on keeping their old people clothes on their old people bodies, fine. But you are going to let it all hang out, my friend. Until they leave. And don't come back.

3. The best housewarming parties involve fondue - The more fondue, the better. All kinds of fondue. Cheese, chocolate, ham. Yes, ham fondue. It's melted ham. Doe that sound disgusting? You bet it does. No matter -- the point is that you've moved in together, and if your friends won't eat a little melted ham to celebrate your love, then they're not your real friends.


4. If you don't like what the other person is wearing, swear at them -- That means, when you're about to leave the house, and you totally hate the outfit they have on, the right thing to do is say (in a quiet, soothing voice), "What the f*** are you wearing?" Then just stare at them until they change.


5. When you can't agree on what movie to see, compromise wiht a stupid movie about a stupid couple -- She wants to go see that stupid movie about those stupid girls who talk bout their problems and cry. He wants to see that movie about those stupid guys who battle some stupid monsters who want to eat the planet. The perfect compromise is to see that  stupid movie about that stupid couple who move in together and everything goes horrible wrong because they don't itemize the bills and she has this stupid eye mask she wears before bed and Zach Galifianakis plays his best friend and then everything works out at the end because they realize that even though they're both stupid, they're actually perfect for each other.

Daily praise.

Psalm 103


1My whole being, praise the Lord;
    all my being, praise his holy name.
2My whole being, praise the Lord
    and do not forget all his kindnesses.
3He forgives all my sins
    and heals all my diseases.
4He saves my life from the grave
    and loads me with love and mercy.
5He satisfies me with good things
    and makes me young again, like the eagle.


6The Lord does what is right and fair
    for all who are wronged by others.
7He showed his ways to Moses
    and his deeds to the people of Israel.
8The Lord shows mercy and is kind.
    He does not become angry quickly, and he has
          great love.
9He will not always accuse us,
    and he will not be angry forever.
10He has not punished us as our sins should be punished;
    he has bit repaid us for the evil we have done.
11As high as the sky is above the earth,
    so great is his love for those who respect him
12He has taken our sins away from us
    as far as the east is from the west.
13The Lord has mercy on those who respect him,
    as a father has mercy on his children.
14He knows how we were made;
    he remembers that we are dust.


Psalm 139


13You made my whole being;
    you formed me in my mother's body.
14I praise you because you made me in an amazing and
          wonderful way.
    What you have done is wonderful.
     I know this very well.
15You saw my bones being formed
     as I took shape in my mother's body.
When I was put together there,
16     you saw my body as it was formed.
All the days planned for me
     were written in your book
     before I was one day old.

Groomsman Boutonnieres

The Knot

Breath.

     Here I am, squishing my pillows and fluffing my comfortable, attempting to get comfortable in my queen sized bed, in my apartment for one, accompanied by a sleepy dog and cat who howls at my door at all hours of the night. I have a bottle of Robitussin sitting on my night stand and I have clung to this bottle all evening, it has become my life support and has helped subdue my cough with in the last 12 hours. I realized tonight while watching a movie that my cough has consumed every fiber of my being to the point where I have lost the ability to produce a laugh. My throat is torn to shreds but, I can still speak and carry on a conversation. So as I am sinking into my soft, slumberous bed, one word comes to mind: breath.
     God has given me breath. As much as I have complained and ached over this cough, I have forgotten that under this exhausting frustration I have misplaced thankfulness. Then I began to think about my work; about the team of people that are coming into my work place in the next week to make sure that we are up to par on policies, and what I could say to them if they asked me what my organizations policy was. This is what I would tell them, "Well, to be honest, I am not sure what our mission is word for word, but this is where I can find it...." and then I would proceed to tell them that, "I am here to serve and to love these kids. Kids that have stories I couldn't even fathom. Kids who are broken and need the support so that they can be the best they can be. So that they can have a future and dream!" God has given my kids breath. Just as he has given me breath. And I am not quite sure where I am going with this but I know that He began with Adam and Eve, two people, placed in the middle of a garden.
     Genesis 2:7 "Then the Lord God took dust from the ground and formed a man from it. He breathed the breath of life into the man's nose, and the man became a living person." Just like that God make Adam. He gave breath to Adam as He has to me. I am living a life for what? What I am living for? To eat the forbidden fruit? Am I living for the material possessions, for things that are just temporary? Just as this cough has consumed me, so will the temporary things of this world. I have a voice, I am able to speak above the consuming sin and temptations. He hears me. I may have lost my ability to laugh right now but He is waiting to fill my life with an everlasting joy. I just need to give Him my all.
     Acts 8:36 "While they were traveling down the road, they came to some water. The officer said, "Look, here is water. What is stopping me from being baptized?"  What am I waiting for? What are we waiting for? What holds us back from being completely drenched in the Holy Spirit? What keeps us from allowing God to dwell in our hearts and consume our lives? For me it's fear. It's temptation. It's the lack of confidence. I am afraid that if I allow Him to consume my life, that I may lose my sight of who I really am. I am not confident in my ability to completely devote myself to Him and not be tempted by outer things. God is sitting here, telling me to breathe. Just breathe. Dwell in peace and He will be there.

Engagement Photos!

Photos taken by my Maid of Honor, Shanna Vincent! 

Maybe it's just me...

I have this phobia of sharing something I like, like a favorite song, idea, name, or whatever I may want to claim for some big moment in my life in fear that someone else will use it. It sounds selfish, bitchy, and just down right obnoxious...but I think that's the catty side of me. But let's face it, it happens, things get taken, it's just the fact that I am one person out of nearly 7 million people on this small planet. People can share. I can share. Right? I believe though, I can say confidently on my blog that no one is going to intentionally steal a silly song that I post...let's face it, it's just a selfish bridal fear. I have fallen head over heals for Joshua Radin's voice and his music. I love his songs and I secretly hope Nick does too...if not, I'll keep him to myself. :) Here is my latest favorite, dibs on it for any part of my wedding or future for all you thieves out there ;).

Updated Checklist

::Flowers and decorations
::DJ
::Live Music
::Song lists
::Engagement photos  [done this Sunday 10/17]
::Photobooth?
::Invitations/Programs [save the dates!]
::Rings & insurance
::Cake
::Rehearsal dinner
::Accommodations for guests and pastor
::Gift registries
::Bridal party gifts
::Wedding favors - trial run

Invitations

To make our own or order them from a company...

Friends.

Nick and I are surrounded by beautiful friends and family. I am getting more and more excited about the men and women apart of our bridal group, the relationships we have with them, the memories, and the laughter that has taken and will take place. Love every one of them! 

Wedding flowers!!

the beautiful colors of our wedding in 222 days! 

(taken with cellphone)

Something Beautiful -- Newsboys

I wanna start it over
I wanna start again
I want a new beginning

One without an end

I feel it inside
Calling out to me

It's a voice that whispers my name

It's a kiss without any shame
Something beautiful
Like a song that stirs in my head
Singing love will take us where
Something's beautiful

I've heard it in the silence

Seen it on a face
I've felt it in a long hour
Like a sweet embrace
I know this is true
It's calling out to me

It's a voice that whispers my name

It's a kiss without any shame
Something beautiful
Like a song that stirs in my head
Singing love will take us where
Something's beautiful

It's the child on her wedding day

It's the daddy that gives her away
Something beautiful
When we laugh so hard we cry
It's the love between you and I
Something beautiful

Wedding To-dos.

::Flowers and decorations
::DJ
::Live Music
::Song lists
::Engagement photos
::Photobooth?
::Invitations/Programs [save the dates!]
::Rings & insurance
::Cake
::Rehearsal dinner
::Accommodations for guests and pastor
::Gift registries
::Bridal party gifts
::Wedding favors - trial run

Church and Reception Hall.

Posted the pictures backwards.

The reception is at Baker Lofts Event Center.

We are getting married at Harderwyk Ministries. Less then 8 months!

Here comes the bride!

Our escape to the reception!

ceremony decor

I love everything about the baby's breath in these photos.

Credit given to Amy Carroll photography. http://www.acarrollphotography.com/

Credit given to Dan Stewart photography. http://danstewartphotography.com/

weary.

I am tired today. My feet have been dragging and my apartment is a disaster zone. I have no motivation to give away the piles of goodwill stuff that have been sitting here forever. No motivation to do anything else other than exist today. I was on a go-go-go kick before Montana, wanting to get things done and keep in contact with people. But since the trip, I have slowly deteriorated and I feel like I am treading water, not going anywhere, not doing anything, just treading away. I am hungry for fellowship, for a connection with a church and a congregation but I watch each Sunday pass me by. I desire to feel revived and renewed. To be healthy and energetic. I want to fall asleep next to Nick every night and to be able to see each other as husband and wife. Not just, I have time to come into town for two days and then it's back to separation. I know I shouldn't complain, there are husbands and wives who go days, weeks, months apart from one another. Military men and women leave there spouses and families behind every day. But I desire to be married and live a life as husband and wife. So many things that I want but am I thankful for what I have? For the fellowship of friends and family I already have? For a God that exists in my heart, who knocks at my door until I am ready for him to come in. To live in a place where I can feel safe talking about God or blogging about God for that matter. To be at a point in my life where I am marrying my best friend and lover. To have a job that pays the bills and puts a roof over my head. Not enough do I thank God for doing what he is doing in my life. Not enough do I allow myself to hear him nor do I open up my heart in prayer to him. He's waiting for me to be vulnerable to him. Waiting so that he can speak into my life and give me breath. Waiting to show me endless love. To give me the gifts of strength and peace on days like today. I pray that I can open up my heart to Him once again as His child. I pray that I remember to be thankful and to be confident in the things He has provided me.

dress in my closet.

This gushiness started with me watching P.S. I Love You tonight which lead to trying on my wedding shoes again.....and my dress :)

We have hit the 8th month mark, I know it's not quite the 6th, but it's the 8th!! :)

I have 8 more months to play my Ingrid Michaelson, Peggy Lee, and Carrie Underwood Pandora as loud as I want! 8 more months of hogging the whole bed, sleeping with 5 pillows, and taking up the entire bathroom counter. 8 more months of filling the entryway shoe rack with unnecessary shoes and watching P.S. I Love You as much as I want. But, I am so ready for these next 8 months to fly by. I am so eager to be married to my best friend. To battle over Peggy Lee Pandora or the Xbox 360. To cuddle with my husband and not 5 different pillows. To throw out shoes that haven't stepped outside the apartment since they were carried into it. And so I may have to throw a few suspense, action movies in...I can still sneak in my chick flicks every now and then. It'll be worth it. To come home to the man I love everyday. I know there will be stress, but I'm not worried about it, because this is my fairytale, our fairytale and I can't wait to marry my best friend in 8 months. To see him at the end of that aisle and know that that moment will be the first moment of the rest of our lives together as husband and wife. :)

Sweet dreams <3

playlist.

Somewhere Over the Rainbow -- Israel 'IZ' Kamakawiwo'ole

You and I -- Ingrid Michaelson

Can't Help Falling in Love -- Ingrid Michaelson

You and I -- Antoine Dugor

Home to Me -- Josh Kelly

Stand by Me -- Rockapella

So Deep in Love -- Six days

Reason I Come Home -- Ron Pope

I'm Yours -- Ron Pope

Perfect for Me -- Ron Pope

This Will Be an Everlasting Love -- Natalie Cole [too cliche]

You Belong to Me -- Jason Wade

Your Love is a Song -- Switchfoot

1,2,3,4 -- Fiest

Marry Me -- Train [First dance song or walk down the aisle to]

Bring Me Flowers -- Hope

Have a Little Faith in Me -- John Hiatt

You are Lovely Tonight -- Joshua Radin [First or Last dance song]

At Last -- Etta James

Once in a Lifetime -- Keith Urban

Our Kind of Love -- Lady Antebellum

Everything -- Michael Buble

Crazy Love -- Michael Buble

Dream a Little Dream -- Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong

I'm Yours/Somewhere Over the Rainbow -- Straight No Chaser

So Are You to Me -- EastMountainSouth

You are the Best Thing -- Ray Lamontagne [After the "I Do's" and First Kiss]

The Way you Look Tonight -- Tony Bennett

Feels Like Home -- Chantal Kreviazuk

More than a Man -- Dave Barnes

One Picture -- Peter Bradley Adams

Lucky -- Jason Mraz

Bust a Move -- Young MC

Boogie Shoes -- KC and the Sunshine Band
Taking Care of Business --- (Alligator Dance)

You are the Best Thing -- Ray Lamontagne [Birdal Party Recessional]
Love Like This -- Natasha Bedingfield [Wedding party entrance to reception]

How You Live -- Point of Grace 

My Little Girl -- Tim Mcgraw 

304.

Planning a wedding makes me scratch my head. It causes eyebrow scrunching wonderment. I know that planning a wedding can be a big task but, it doesn't feel that big yet. It feels simple, does it start with simplicity? I am a baby bride so bear with me. I have come to a halt in the middle of my road. I feel like I haven't woken up to the reality of planning. We have our church and reception hall contracts signed. We have talked to the photographer and the pastor, and a budget is set. And let's not forget, my shoes for the big day have been purchased and are sitting at the top of my closet. These shoes are dancing inside their box, calling my name, yelling at me. They want to be worn and I can't wait to wear them. I feel like I am six again, doing a dance of my own, the pee dance; waiting, biting my lip and running around in circles. I don't know where to go from here. I think I am having a crisis moment, without the drama. No tears, screaming, or frustration today. Just awaiting the next step while sitting in my bed with an "80's called and they want their scrunchie back" hair-do and face mask on. For now, I leave with flowers/looks that I love, colors, texture, oh so yummy.











photos taken from www.theknot.com

Spreading my wings.

Sometimes it's good to dwell in peace, to allow yourself to have time for yourself. To think deeply if one chooses to, to not think at all, to miss something or someone, to feel, to hear your heart speak. I think about people around me, people who surround my life, who love me, who care for me. People I love and care for. I think about how much each individual means to me. I think of my fiancee. I think of our yesterday, of our now, and of our future. I think of how my hand feels in his, how my heart feels safe with him. I have forgotten what it is like to be with out him and fear that a day with out him could come. I fear that I could lose him, or anyone close to me. I don't think about these things to be depressed, I don't want to dwell in thinking that anything can happen and who is here today, can be gone tomorrow. But in these thoughts I find how much I truly love him, how much I truly love the people that surround me. I take advantage of time, I fall into my routine and habits. Life isn't a routine, it is an adventure. Each day is a new day, a new chance or opportunity to tell someone how much they mean to you, to spread your wings and fly. A baby bird hobbles to the edge of his or her nest and takes a plunge, flapping their wings as hard as they can in hope of climbing into the sky. What if we treated each day as just that? Hobbling to the edge of our nests and flapping our wings as hard as we can in hope of soaring into the sky. We can hope and dream. We can believe that we can achieve and have strength. We can love and be loved. Four years ago I took a chance, I hobbled to the edge of my nest, my security, and I took the plunge. The man I am marrying April 2, 2010 caught me. I am flapping my wings as hard as I can each day to achieve all that I can. To be who I was created to be as a daughter, a sister, a wife, a friend, a care worker, and much more. I am spreading my wings and flying. I am creating my yesterdays, my nows, and my future.

Timeless.

I had the privilege of modeling for Liz today in her Regency hair fashion show -- she created a classic 40's updo and I felt timeless.

Wedding Ideas

I think this blogspot will become a place for journaling about my life and ALL that it includes. So that may be thoughts and ideas, things I am annoyed with or overjoyed about. This also can entail wedding planning ideas. I come across ideas that I really like and want to remember, I scribble it down where ever I can...and then I lose the receipt or bill envelope that I scribbled it down on. So maybe this will work? Here's to an idea that I really like: Hanging Mason Jars --- candles verses flowers?

Might require some patience and the enlistment of help, but if we [note: Nick hasn't seen the idea yet] planned ahead they could be done.

They might look really neat hanging from pews with bouquets in them? Or at the reception??? I love the cozy feeling of incorporating vintage [correct word?] into the wedding.

http://www.intimateweddings.com/blog/flower-diy-bouquets-in-hanging-mason-jars/ [ideas and photos from this website]

Rain Again.

It's rainy again today. What's up May? April showers bring May flowers? I guess my car is getting a free carwash :). I woke up late again this morning, woke up to a text at 7:45am, thank goodness. I have to leave for my staff meeting in a half hour and my knees are killing me for some reason. I slept well last night and yesterday was a good day at work. The girls were in a good mood for the most part. Some of them were dealing with everyday emotions but with some love and care they can make it through to the end of the day. Some of them can't wait to go to sleep so that the day that they are having, if bad, is over and they can start afresh the next day. Sometimes I know I feel like that. Sometimes I feel like that for a whole week. Just wishing I could go to sleep on a Sunday knowing that I have a whole new week ahead of me and new footprints to put down. Every day is a new day, a new day to leave behind the old. Sometimes that old carries on with us, sometimes that old is hard to slough off but when we let it fall, oh does it feel good. We aren't meant to carry heavy weights. Our bodies are so sensitive to what we do and what happens to us. Our bodies pay attention to our pain and our hurt. And when we don't listen to what we really need, what our hearts really crave, we become old really quickly. God calls us to walk in freedom and in peace. His yoke is easy and burden is light.We are called to lay it all at the feet of the cross and leave it there. When we are carrying our burdens around for so long, I think we become comfortable with them. Our weights become our security and our hurts, our blanket. How do we remove these, allowing ourselves to trust and walk away believing that we have the ability to walk strong in a new comfort of freedom? And how do we use that freedom?

Rain.

It's 10:00am on May 11, 2010 and it is freezing outside. It's raining and miserable. Nick is sound asleep and I am trying to sum up the motivation to get ready for the day. I am bringing him back to Holland and I'll be off to work at 2:30pm. We spent the last day and a half together; I long to have days, like the past day, all the time! I love being engaged and planning a wedding but part of me wishes he was here with me, living with me in Grand Rapids, and we were coming home together at the end of the day everyday. I love being with him. Sunday we went to a $3.00 movie. Yesterday we ran errands and grabbed lunch. We went to Ross' baseball game and then came home. We spent the evening playing Yahtzee and coloring!! The $3.00 movie we saw was Date Night -- a great movie and a great lesson brought home. We never want to be a boring couple! We understand that life will throw us curve balls and we will have our days, but we don't want to become just great roommates when we are married. So here is to 327 more days of planning and preparing for a lifetime with my best friend and lover. Putting on my rain boots and a ball cap.